keys please!!!!

So...funny story...

Thursday night, the night before I left for my vacation to Roatan, me and several of my friends were spending some quality time together talking about what we were going to be doing over the weekend. We were having a great time, especially since our friend, Geoff, the really obnoxious AFN guy, lost a bet (Packers got beat by the Vikings) and he had to wear a dress out to the local watering hole...for the entire night! Too funny! but...I digress...

So at some point during the night, my hooch key fell off my key ring that is attached to my purse. I didn't notice when this happened of course, but when I walked home with my friend Kris, it was obvious that I had no way of getting in to my house. So she and I searched everywhere we had been around my house, which included my neighbor's porch. As I was walking down the steps, she said something from behind me and I turned to look, at which point my foot slipped and I rolled my ankle...and fell right on my face...not pretty.

So as I rolled around on the ground in agony, Kris called some people to help look for the key in some of the other places we had been that night...but to no avail. One of my friends went a got the replica from the housing office and brought it back to try in the door...didn't work. So now I was crippled with pain with nothing but some chicken wire and a mesh screen (what covers my windows) between me and some Tylenol. I didn't feel like waiting any longer, so I broke into my house through the window...unlocked the door and went to sleep.

The next morning, I almost overslept for the 0600 showtime at the bus we were taking to Roatan. As I get up and fall right back down (my ankle is the size of a cantalope) I realize that I am going to have a mobility challenge to overcome. I hopped into the EZgo and high-tailed it to the pick up site. When I got there I unloaded my suitcase and sat it upright on the gravel...then sat on it. Someone brushed against my bum ankle, causing me to instinctively draw it up, putting me off-balance, and I went feet over head backwards...landing on my head AGAIN, this time in front of about 50 people...who gave me a round of applause...hmm.

The weekend passed with no kankle issues, but when I returned, I had to take the key (that didn't work) back to the housing office...take a form to finance...who told me to go to contracting...then back to finance...pay 25$ for a replacement key...and then take the form back to the housing office. Due to my bum ankle, my troop was driving me around and asked, "Why do you have to go to all these places?" I told him it was because I had lost my hooch key. "Was it small and gold and not on a keyring?" he inquired..."Why yes..." I replied as he smiled and starting chuckling..."my friend found a key like that the other night...its at the Rally Point...haha."

I started to feel my blood pressure go up as my eye started twitching...and I calmly walked into the housing office and asked them to wait until I could confirm if the key was mine. "Sure, no problem! We'll go over and see if we can find one that fits your door today...just in case!" Ok.

So I go back to work after wasting $25 dollars and 1.5 hours running around and I finally got to leave at 530...only to go home and find out that my door was locked!!! HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN?

Well, when they were finding a key that fit, apparently they politely locked the door behind them...hmmm...DID THEY FORGET WHY THEY WERE THERE IN THE FIRST PLACE?

SO...I retrieved the lost key later last night, after breaking into my house, yet again, and as I put it into the lock I just knew...It would open with ease...and then it did...

...now I'm trying to get a refund! I won't hold my breath...

...Jane...out...